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The author:(作者)归海一刀published in(发表于) 2014/1/30 6:00:46 If technology companies to participate in the spring， they play would be like this，
If technology companies to participate in the spring, their scripts are-pony Ma, MA-IT information If technology companies to participate in the spring, they play would be like this
Today is new year's Eve, before the spring night reflected on television, we carefully launched an appetizer-the year of science and technology of spring "year after year", welcomes everyone to enjoy!
(The party purely fictitious, if the same ... ... Happy new year! )
"Welcome horse tech Spring Festival evening show host comes up! ”
Vintage, hand in hand, Chen I-boat.
Chen yizhou: "year, this year's Spring Festival evening of science and technology is being named, why the theme, there are two ' year '? ”
Old: "a boat, to say the title is with us, you see that there are two ' a ' word? ”
Chen yizhou: "[Khan] ... ... Years, you say, then why we hosted this year's Spring Festival evening show? ”
Ageing: "probably because our program nobody read it......"
Chen yizhou: "[Khan] ... ... Well, we see others perform ... ... "
Song: map of crazy, guest performers: Baidu, Gould
Gould: "maps for free so sad
Why do you let me share
Day and night will ask you do not answer
What you'll get ... ... "
Baidu: "want to ask if you dare
As you say, free
Wanted to ask if you dare
Refund to the user as I am...... "
Love song Duet: are you happy? Guest performers: where network, automotive home
Automotive home: "you're happy I'm happy we finally listed this year ... ..."
Where to network: "do you happy I'm happy rich fear price war......"
Automotive home: "you're happy I'm happy first day of share price almost doubled ... ..."
Where to network: "you're happy I'm happy first day of share price almost doubled ... ..."
Chorus: "listing, IPO, happiness is something so easy ... ..."
Traditional folk art program: the guest performers of the second half: Tencent, Ali, NetEase
NetEase: "this year we have released the letter, very good yo, Yo and telecommunications cooperation, sending traffic yo ... ..."
Ali: "we have launched this year, we had Zhao Wei, Shi Yuzhu us Oh, oh we ren Zhiqiang ... ..."
Tencent: "micro-270 million monthly active users. ”
NetEase: "......"
Ali: "......"
Tencent: "sorry, I mean more than 270 million. ”
Micro-pieces: the bet guest performers: Beijing East, dangdang, millet, gree
Millet: "I bet you $ 1 money ... ..."
English: "you want to bet 1 billion! ”
Millet: "kids, too......"
East: "you lost! Our profit this year! ”
Dangdang: "profit? What is profit? ”
East: "don't put on an Act, are you afraid to lose? ”
Dangdang: "well, losses after 10 quarters in a row, win or lose this thing, early light......"
The end of
Host a comeback.
Ageing: "I found that in 2013, the technology ' Chan ' name entrepreneur, are not very good luck. You, me, and bridges ... ... "
Chen yizhou: "really, you said that in 2013, Mong Kok which last name entrepreneurs? ”
Ageing: "is supposed to be ' horse, ' look, MA, and Ma ... ..."
Chen yizhou: "[Khan] ... ... Years, they have been very busy over the years, okay? ”
Ageing: "keep your chin up and will in the future. ”
Chen yizhou: "I'm fine, I can just go to the stock market ... ..."
Ageing: "......"
如果科技公司参加春晚，他们的剧本会是这样 - 马化腾,马云 - IT资讯如果科技公司参加春晚，他们的剧本会是这样
今天是除夕，在电视里的春晚上映前，我们精心为您推出一道开胃菜——马年科技春晚之“一年又一年”，欢迎大家欣赏！
(本晚会纯属虚构,如果雷同……新年快乐！)
“掌声欢迎马年科技春晚主持人登场！”
陈年、陈一舟携手等台。
陈一舟：“年哥，今年的科技春晚是不是被你们凡客冠名了，为什么主题里面，有两个‘年’字？”
陈年：“一舟，要说冠名那也是我们一起，你没发现里面还有两个‘一’字么？”
陈一舟：“[汗]……年哥，你说为啥找我们主持今年春晚？”
陈年：“可能是因为我们俩的节目没人看吧……”
陈一舟：“[汗]……好吧，我们看其他人表演吧……”
歌曲：《为地图痴狂》，表演嘉宾：百度、高德
高德：“地图免费这样忧伤
为何还让我分享
日夜都问你也不回答
怎么你会变这样……”
百度：“想要问问你敢不敢
像你说过的那样的免费
想要问问你敢不敢
像我这样给用户退钱……”
情歌对唱：《你快乐吗？》表演嘉宾：去哪儿网、汽车之家
汽车之家：“你快乐吗我很快乐今年我们终于上市了……”
去哪儿网：“你快乐吗我很快乐有钱了不怕价格大战了……”
汽车之家：“你快乐吗我很快乐第一天股价差点翻倍了……”
去哪儿网：“你快乐吗我很快乐第一天股价差点翻倍了……”
合唱：“上市，IPO，快乐就是这么容易的东西……”
传统曲艺节目：《两句半》表演嘉宾：腾讯、阿里、网易
网易：“今年我们推出了易信，很厉害呦，和电信合作的呦，送流量呦……”
阿里：“我们今年推出了来往，我们有赵薇哦，我们有史玉柱哦，我们有任志强哦……”
腾讯：“微信月活跃用户2.7亿。”
网易：“……”
阿里：“……”
腾讯：“对不起，是超过2.7亿。”
微小品：《打赌》表演嘉宾：京东、当当、小米、格力
小米：“我赌1块钱……”
格力：“要赌赌10亿！”
小米：“冲动是魔鬼……”
京东：“你输了！我们今年盈利了！”
当当：“盈利？什么是盈利？”
京东：“别装相，你是不是怕输？”
当当：“唉，连续亏损10个季度后，输赢这种事，哥早就看淡了……”
尾声
主持人再度登台。
陈年：“我发现，2013年，科技圈‘陈’姓的企业家，运气都不太好。你，我，还有天桥……”
陈一舟：“还真是，那你说，2013年，哪个姓氏的企业家比较旺？”
陈年：“应该是‘马’，你看啊，马化腾、马云……”
陈一舟：“[汗]……年哥，他们这些年一直很旺好不好？”
陈年：“别灰心，未来会好的。”
陈一舟：“没事，大不了我还可以去炒股……”
陈年：“……”
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